#61. A Ring for No One (Saturday, May 14, 2011)

What was your best day…of doing something completely outlandish, but not caring because it made someone else happy?

There were few things that my mom wanted more in life than for her kids to get married. So much so that she was willing to skip like five steps and buy a ring for her son’s wife – before he’s even expressed any interest in getting a girlfriend – in the hopes that he’ll finally get his ass moving on that front…

And that’s basically what happened here.

So, the summer after my third year at Waterloo, I went with my mom to Shanghai for two months; both for me to do an internship at one of the banks there, and to visit (all) my relatives (#75).

On the trip there, we make a stop in Hong Kong for a day and a half. It’s my first time there. And, after napping off the time difference and seeing a few sights, for some reason we go into this ring store and my mom spends three plus hours trying to buy a ring…which she implies is to give to my brother or I to give to some hypothetical future wife. Strange.

We do end up negotiating a good price for one, and then my credit card gets blocked because of the amount, so there’s another hour of finagling before that precious piece of jewelry is in our possession.

For some reason, despite being fully cognizant that I was spending $3,000 on an object that I might never use, that whole ordeal felt kind of great. I suppose because it made my mom really, really happy. (Also, it felt like I was finally being a grown-up…but without having to go through the trouble of actually doing any grown-up things.)

But while that was the most notable part of the whole experience, just as great was what followed in the days after.

We arrive in Shanghai and my uncle and my older cousin Zhou Ling come pick us up. As with last time, it’s an exciting experience (except here, without the two-days sleep deprivation, #75). Then we get in the car and drive off, and I see that neither of them are wearing seat-belts in the front seat. And apparently this is the case for everyone in China. Which totally shocks me and leads to my mom screaming at them for ten minutes¹.

The next day, Saturday, I go with my younger cousin Kang to play some basketball. As I was eleven the last time I was in Shanghai, it was a really cool feeling to just take off into wider city without my parents there. We take the subway² to this huge outdoor athletic area with 20+ basketball courts. We play for an hour, and Kang is literally the worst basketball player I have ever played against.³

That night we have dinner at a restaurant with the entire extended family there. Between my last visit to now, I’ve become slightly more amenable to trying new things – so I fully enjoy all of the thirty plus dishes on the big spinning tray on our table. Once we’re done eating, I go with Kang and my uncle to this pool hall downstairs to shoot some; Zhou Ling wants to join us, but he’s fully whipped by his recently-married wife⁴ so he backs out. Kang is a lot better at this, so he creams us.

Traveling somewhere for the first time as an adult. Hanging out with family you haven’t seen in almost nine years. And getting a head start on a life decision that you may never have to actually make.

All the ingredients for a great time.

During which they still do not put the seat-belts on.
Which since 2002, had expanded from three lines to sixteen and had also added glass barriers between the platform and the track – something that the North America subways have not yet been bothered to do.
Note that during my last visit he got his foot stuck in a bicycle wheel, so he was – as my relatives liked to term behind his back – a bit slow.
Who was also an extremely picky eater and didn’t work; and this was before they starting having kids (yes, “kids”, apparently the one-child policy doesn’t apply if the parents are both only children); so there were also a lot of nasty things being said about her behind her back.